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Especially since this was the only place in his life where he felt he had any control at all.(BREAK)"Tell me again, son, why you were all in Knockturn Alley?" Mr. Weasley pleaded in a numb voice, addressing Ron. There was not a moment Ron had stopped crying since Percy, Bellatrix and the Malfoys had run off. Now was no exception as he struggled to answer through his sobs."It was my idea, dad." Fred answered quietly for him. He had shed his tears and now Harry watched as the hardened face of anger and regret took over. He knew that face well. "We needed some things for- it doesn’t matter. I wish we had never gone." But you did and YOU LIED TO ME!!!" Mrs. Weasley yelled. She hadn’t said a word since Hermione had contacted her and now her grief was creeping in. "IF YOU HAD SHOPPED LIKE YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED. YOU KNEW HOW DANGEROUS IT IS THERE!!! IF YOU HADN’T GONE THEN WE WOULDN’T HAVE TO BE GOING TO… to... to anyone’s funeral." She finished quietly. When the clerk, a very buxom young girl, asks if she can get him anything, he leans over and whispers “Is it true that you give hand jobs in the back room?” “Why yes, sir” the shop assistant coos. “I’ve already had 5 satisfied customers this morning, and it’s only 11:30am”. “Good good” the man replies. “Well, go and wash yer hands then - I only want a ham sandwich”.Three hillbillies were sitting on the porch. The first hillbilly said “My wife is so dumb, yesterday she dragged home a brand new washer and dryer, and we ain’t even got electricity!” The second hillbilly said “My wife is stupider than yers, yesterday she brings home a new dishwasher, and we ain’t even got runnin’ water!” The third hillbilly said “My wife is even stupider! Yesterday I was in the kitchen and I saw her purse on the table. Everything was spilled out of it and there was a bunch of rubbers layin’ there ... and she ain’t even got a dick!”At a wedding party recently someone yelled “All the married men please.
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